Well, Space Monkies, have you ever committed a Sin. Not just a weakling nothing Sin like not saying Grace or lusting after your hot 19-year-old cousin. No I'm talking about the big shit, like murdering somebody, shitting in a nun's habit while she's asleep, or actually getting with your hot 19-year-old cousin. If you have, AWESOME!!! Thumbs up, my man! I am BlueHighwind, and that had nothing to do with the Final Boss at all. Which is who we're killing on this page.
Sin's Insides[]
As you run East, you'll reach a point where the ground forces itself up so that you can go no further. Here head South and into the back of a wall, to find a slippy-slide. Once you've gone down the shoot, open the Chest to find a Laevatein. Now climb up the ledges by using 
till you reach the end of the area. Go up to find the last Save Point in the game. You can use this to go back to the Airship, but know that if you retreat, you'll have to walk all the way back here next time you enter Sin. As you head North, a giant tower will fall in your way. Now is the last chance you'll get to go home. If you head forward, you must either defeat Yu Yevon or die horribly - there is no in-between. Do or do not, there is no try. -- Jedi Master Yoda.
POINT OF NO RETURN
Now that we're past the Event Horizon, we still have on unbelievably annoying thing to do before we kill Tidus's father. Inside the tower, is a weird little spinning crystal world. Here you have to find ten Easter Eggs. That doesn't sound too hard, however the Eggs are constantly disappearing and reappearing, and spikes are popping out of the ground every where. Plus the camera is spinning meaning no control over what Tidus is seeing. Every time a spike hits you, you fight a hard battle with some nasty Fiends. This is probably the most annoying ass-raping fucking mini-game outside of some of the more awful ones in FFVII, but here you can actually die if you screw up. Or worse, you might lose so much energy that Jecht just destroys you. Sometimes Tidus will just fall down for no reason, like he tripped over his shoelaces. A bug like this definitely should have been caught in the testing phase. And as a joke, I guess, for each Easter Egg you find, you get an item.
Once you have all ten, you're transported to location of the Final Battle.
The Final Battle[]
Before you run up to Jecht, be sure to use whatever Potions, Ethers, and Hi-Potions you have to heal up your team's HP and MP. You'll probably need every drop you have for this next battle, which is the hardest in the whole game.
Jecht (and in human form) is hanging in the middle of Dream Zanarkand. How exactly we got here when we're supposed to be inside Sin will forever remain a mystery. I bet the Wizard did it. So now we have to fight. Here we go! Tidus vs. Jecht! Father vs. Son! The battle of the century! The grand finale, the big finish, the crescendo, the Coup de Grâce and the last dance. Let's go, Space Monkies!!!
Oh yeah, Tidus cries again. I'm actually out of insults for this kid. He's just so weak. Pathetic.
| ||||||||||||||||||
|
| ||||||||||||||||||
| ||||||||||||||||||
|
Strategy: Oh man... that does not look at all like a cool final boss... Even worse is the music, which once sent me to the Emergency Room because my ears were actually bleeding. Here's a better version: [1], done by somebody who doesn't sound like a pig getting sodomized. This last fight is fought in two stages. In the first one the Final Aeon has 65,000 HP, and is all around weaker, with less stats and fewer attacks. In the second he has 120,000 HP and is the most difficult Final Boss since the dark days of Neo Ex-Death. First Form: If you bothered to grab the Celestial Weapons neither one of these fights will be very difficult at all. But that's just cheating so I'm assuming that you're fighting him as a regular team without ridiculous super powers. The first thing that needs to go are those Yu Pagodas. They can heal Jecht for 15,000 a turn, and heal all status effects (like the essential "Armor Break"), and can attack you with status effects, AND boost his Overdrive Meter. So these things must go down as soon as possible. Bad news though, they'll just come back to life in a few all too short turns. Lulu's "Flare" and Yuna's "Holy" will destroy them both in one turn. Jecht's Overdrive Meter will slowly build up over the course of the fight, but this process is accelerated a lot by those Pagodas. Tidus can knock it back down with his "Talk" Command, but you can only do that twice so save it for the next battle. Now focus on building up a defense. "Haste" and "Protect" all your units on the field. "Protect is essential because most of the Final Aeon's attacks are physical in nature. And they hurt worse then getting a tooth pulled by pencil. Luckily Braska's Aeon's HP is pretty low this round, so knocking it down shouldn't be much of a hill to climb. Save your Aeons and your MP for the next round. Second Form: Jecht will pull an amazingly phallic-looking sword out of his amazingly vaginal-looking chest. This part is what makes Brask'a Final Aeon, the most difficult boss in the entire game. Forget the WEAPONs, they can be destroyed with the Celestial Weapons. However this Boss is in the regular game, so it just isn't right to use those nukes on a third world country. The Pagados are now back, so kill them off again. He's got some nasty new tricks now, like "Jecht Beam" which can Petrify your characters. Heal this IMMEDIATELY. If he hits a Stoned (heh heh) character with his regular attack they will shatter and then they are gone forever. You can't even replace them, you have to fight with only two allies. If he isn't really close to death, just restart the damn game. The same strategy above should apply, only take those gloves off. Aeons should come in fast and leave faster, only hitting for an Overdrive. If you keep them around too long, then those fucking Pagodas will revive and actually heal will. So Overdrive, then pull them out. Use both "Talk" Commands. Jecht's Overdrive "Ultimate Jecht Shot" will fuck you up. It hits for 5,000 HP and can completely slaughter weaker teams. Whatever you do, make sure you're not hit by that. Throw away all your MP, use Megalixers to restore it. Don't hold back at all. Those Items won't have much use in the End Credits, so why the hell are you saving them? Just hit with everything you got. The final 60,000 can be finished off by Anima. And throw Bahamut in next if he's still standing. This may take a few tries, but once you got him, the game is yours. | ||||||||||||||||||
After the battle sing out your best Victory Fanfare, because now you cannot lose. Jecht dies, but since nobody can die quietly in Final Fantasy (except Sephiroth and Aeris - FFVII RULES!!!) he gives off a few words before his eternal slumber. His final words are insults to his son about how he's such a fucking wuss crybaby. But then he actually gets up on his own, making me wonder just how fatally injured he really is. Perhaps he's just faking it?
Lord Bahamut, I am so sorry. The game made me do it! FORGIVE ME!!! (cries bitterly)
After this comes the worst part of the entire game. The Wizard walks in and commands us to Summon all the Aeons. However once you do that, Yu Yevon will posses them, meaning you have to kill your own beloved Summons. What a cruel fucking game. I hope Bahamut and Shiva will forgive me. It wasn't my fault - the game made me do it. I love them both, and hope that they find it in their magical Aeon hearts to forgive me.
But at least the Wizard finally got off his skinny ass and finally decided to help us out. Now we're invincible. If a character dies, he's instantly revived. Too bad he saved it for these fights, which are infinitely easier than that with Jecht. Its probably impossible to lose even without Insta-Revive.
Once you've ruthlessly slaughtered all of your dear Aeon friend's (damn you Square!), the final battle is with Yu Yevon. If you think that the big bad villain is cool looking, interesting, or at all imposing, then you don't know Yu.
| ||||||||||||||||||
|
| ||||||||||||||||||
| ||||||||||||||||||
|
Strategy: So in the end, the great fearsome Yu Yevon is just a floating cockroach. I call shenanigans! This is a rip-off. Plus with the Wizard bringing back all fallen characters this battle simply cannot be lost. And trust me, I've tried. Beat him down in anger for making us kill our Aeons. PS: You can't use your Aeons in this fight. It would be a cool glitch if you could, but alas its impossible. | ||||||||||||||||||
After the battle the world is saved, and peace and justice will prevail over Spira. Not longer will the people live in fear of Sin or suffer under the oppressive rule of the Church.
But who cares about that? Killing Yu Yevon also kills Tidus, which is the greatest gift I could ever ask for.
Yup in the end of the game, Tidus dies. Awwwweeesoome... I don't think I've ever been so happy in my entire life. Thank God that whiny bitch is dead. Yuna is sad, which makes me feel a little bad, but she'll get over it. And now that Blondie is out of my way I can move in. Hell yeah! This working out better than I thought.
However this happy time is broken by a sad moment. Auron is gone too. He got sick of living now that his life purpose was fulfilled and so Yuna sent him to the Farplane (which in a wild twist, turns out to be the Underworld of the Olympus Colosseum in Kingdom Hearts II, who knew?). RIP, Auron, I'll always have previous Saved Files in which we can play together once again.
In the end Yuna gives a really lame speech. I'm not going to summarize because it sucks in every way a thing can suck. And with that, FFX is finally beaten. Put it one your list of games that you've finished, which is now one game longer.
Final Fantasy X-2 Walkthrough[]
FFX-2 is an abomination brought upon mankind to punish us for using Machina. The pain still hurts years later. Billions died in the horrific cataclysm, and the world never really did recover. I personally lost several loved ones in the disaster. FFX-2 is also directly responsible for the War in Iraq, Hurricane Katrina, and the Tsunami that destroyed Southeast Asia back in 2005.
So my complete walkthrough is only three words: "Don't play FFX-2."