Hamfruitcake with her exam in four hours is rejoicing the return of the internet, you'd think she'd be revising for her exam in four hours but this seemed more urgent.
Back to Mideel[]
At the clinic in Mideel you’ll find Tifa worrying endlessly about Cloud and then suddenly an earthquake will occur and the whole city will start to shudder. Tifa runs back to fetch Cloud while the rest of the team escape. We catch a glimpse Weapon flying over the city, brilliant time for him to show up and even better he attacks!
| Boss Battle : Ultimate Weapon |
Not really a boss battle but whatever. This can be quite a tricky battle what with the Weapon’s powerful spells in his arsenal and even more dangerous attacks. Throw up Big Guard and be casting Cure3 and White Wind as bloody often as possible. The battle should only last a few rounds and you will survive. Just pray you didn’t pee your pants in the mean time. If you’re not so concerned about your HP or living the occasional Limit and level 3 spell may be worth throwing out but just concentrate on staying alive for now. If you're quick then you have a good chance of stealing the Curse Ring from him at this point. This is the second chance to get it in the game so it's up to you. |
The Lifestream then begins to spill to the surface and the team zip away to safety whilst Tifa is left with Cloud and his sodding wheelchair, both look slightly alarmed as they fall into the lifestream (from what I can tell by their bulging eyeballs...) and Mideel is destroyed never to be seen again. I guess they didn’t have to worry about Meteor killing them all in the end after all... Ah just think, that stupid woman, with her stupid chocobo are dead now...
Tifa will wake up in a strange dark place with an irritating sketchy whirring noise going on. Watch out, there is going to be a LOT of talking from now on. It’s going to be long and tedious and it’s going to be all about Cloud... Urgh...
Memories[]
Ah, this is what someone’s poop subconscious looks like... I really don’t appreciate the big floating head clutching Cloud in the sky... It’s very distracting. So in this very long segment Tifa helps Cloud find himself by picking through his memories of what he thought was real and what actually was real. Start with the scene to the top of the screen and enter Nibelheim. So the Shinra team march in and Cloud thinks it’s a good idea to stand in the middle, the 1st Class soldier position and Tifa shakes her head despairingly, ‘No Cloud, you’re not that big shot, you’re a liar.’ She comes to the conclusion Cloud was never in Nibelheim all that time ago, even though she did wait for him.
Next talk to Cloud on the left, a discussion about that night on the well will then happen. Cloud’s baby feet were so damn long! Plus I’m so certain he has a little pony tail! Much like German kids you meet on package holidays in the Canary Islands...
Turns out Tifa is forgetting some things about Cloud’s past that she should know, if he is actually a construct of her memories. Talk to the Cloud sitting on the steps to find out more. Cloud’s inner child then makes his move to drop some knowledge on us. Turns out Cloud and Tifa weren’t so close as kids but absence does make the heart grow fonder and Tifa missed him when he left town and thought about him. The day Tifa’s mum died Cloud followed her on some weird suicide mission up Mt Nibel and was blamed for when she fell from a cliff even though he had only tried to help. Cloud then gets upset about his weakness and makes his pledge to be in Solider from that point. But here’s the point, Tifa doesn’t remember this but Cloud does and it definitely happened more than five years ago which doesn’t make him a creation of Hojo, he’s a real human being. Just with yards and yards of baggage.
Back in Nibelheim and we discover what really happened at the reactor, and it’s much better than the story Cloud told us in the first place. Well, I think so, it puts Cloud in a better light almost... Zack went to Nibelheim and it was Cloud who was one of the faceless grunt soldiers. What a twist! Funny scene when Sephiroth marches out of Jenova’s crypt carrying her severed head by the brain, but then Cloud turns up and shows what a true warrior he is by doing the unthinkable by throwing Sephiroth into the lifestream with his own Masamune while impaled on it. Impressive no? Now that’s a story!
So everything is alright now, Cloud is whole and the pair swim up through the lifestream to find themselves washed ashore with an anxious team bearing over them. Barret commends Tifa for being some kind of lady, for putting up with Cloud. I agree and she ponders the whole purpose of the storyline. How people can have so much pent up inside them and things can get so twisted. Cloud then begins to explain himself to the team aboard the Highwind. Cloud admits his weakness and everyone agrees he’s messed up but hey, aren’t we all. So let’s finally get this show on the road. Everyone laughs about Barret’s forgettable train line (which mustn't be unforgettable as they all said it wrong!) and then we’re off! The guy at the bottom of the room was really moved by your story so that’s a relief, he let’s us organise a party and then Cait Sith decides we should head to Junon. Capital idea! Let’s be on our way then! Before you go you can re-enter Mideel and find that crazy lady who was buying everything up from before willing to sell most of the equipment from before. Damn... not dead then...
Optional Stuff[]
First off let’s have some fun with Cloud finally back to his senses. Go to Midgar and talk to the guy by the gate and he’ll mention losing his key on an excavation tour. To Bone Village! Talk to the guy to start digging and look for good treasure and have all the diggers look around on the upper platform then set the bomb off around where they are and then climb down the stairs and dig behind the plane wing to find the Key to Sector Five. Well that's how I did it, this can take a couple tries but in the end the Key will definitely be on the lower level behind that plane wing. Good luck!
Back at Midgar you can now enter through the big door with the 07 on, head into the Midgar to find yourself at Aeris’s Church in Sector 5. Go in the church and you will briefly see a glitch where Aeris will be running around tending to her flowers and then she’ll flicker and disappear.
For a particularly funny scene in this part you’ll need Cid and Tifa in your party. Head straight to the Wall Market, yes that means going through the hole in the wall and working your way through that god awful broken path screen, the Hell Houses will inflict no more fear on you luckily. Remember that Item Shop in Sector 6 that just had a machine gun fire at you? Well with Cid on your team he will happily fix it for you and the thing explodes infuriating Tifa and giving Cid a chance to reply with a hilarious comeback. Out will pop Tifa’s ultimate weapon the Premium Heart. It’s her most powerful weapon but also has no materia growth in it’s slots.
Go talk to the guy in the Machine Gun and he will sell you a Sneak Glove which is excellent for when you’re wanting to steal something from any beasties. For 129,000 gil it doesn’t come cheap but it’s well worth the investment, if you happen to have a mastered an All material that can sell for a mind-blowing 1.4 million gil so it’s a good expenditure to sell and make a fortune never to run low on cash again.
Last up head to Nibelheim and once again, last time, play on Tifa's piano inputting the sequence which plays the Main Theme of Final Fantasy VII to find a letter.
, 
, 
, L1 and , L1 and , , , , L1 and , 
, , ,
You will then receive Tifa's Final Limit Break, Final Heaven and letter from Zangan. With all that done you can be on your way to Junon. See you there.
Junon[]
Head to the village and pay the guard the 10 gil charge to use the elevator. Now to head towards the place where you were fighting the Slaloms, under the lift Rufus used. On your way there Cloud will make the assumption that something might be missing. When you get to the soldiers drilling they will soon run toward the Underwater Reactor, handy! Follow them! The door is on the left when you get to the bottom and it'll be into a lift, you will promptly be engaged in battle with two soldiers who have a bit of a crush on the girl cowering in the corner. Kill them and the girl will be slightly irritated by your murdering of 'two perfectly good men.' Outside the lift you will face two more soldiers. Not a problem.
Run down to the next screen experiencing random battles as you go. It's pretty much a straight line until you reach the save point. Then you'll find yourself in another lift; are we underwater yet? Seems like it... In this watery tunnel, much like the ones you can find at the Sea Life centre, quickly equip a Morph materia to one of your characters and when battling against one of the skeletal boat enemies it can be transformed (via morph) into a Guide book, this will be useful for later when we are facing the mighty Emerald Weapon as it means we can engage in the battle for longer than 20 minutes, and you'll need that. The Ghost Ship has 6,600 HP so you need your killing blow to be Morph, morph attacks only hit for about 150 HP so count of your damage and then use it, or an even quicker method would be to use L4 Suicide and the Morph immediately after, no problemo! Only issue is it's Goannai attack which can occassionally remove the character equipped with the Morph materia causing endless frustration.
In the next room, dare I say it, we might be going even further underwater once you push the big red button. Outside you'll see a couple of submarines getting prepped for an exciting adventure into the depths. Another save point will await you in the next area so use it and then enter an area that looks familiar... Aha, well this is the underground reactor after all! Some soldiers will take you on in a pincer movement but they shouldn't be any issue for your team. Keep heading through and you'll engage with some more soldiers and, undoubtedly, some random battles. In the next room Cloud will see the Huge Materia being extracted from the reactor, I'll assume... Now it seems that we're on a timer. Run straight through the find yourself beside the red submarine, which is now getting the materia safely tucked away inside of it and no one thinks to dive on the mechanical arm and stop it in a mad suicidal last ditch attempt.
Hang on was Reno always standing next to us...?
| Boss Battle : Carry Armour |
The one thing that really irritates me about this guy is how he picks up your characters, much like a big grabbing machine and just won't give them back, worse yet your attacks also damage them. Fantastic! This will be a difficult battle, make no mistakes. Lapis Lazer is it's most powerful attack by far but can be easily dealt with by using a few rounds of Magic Hammer. With that out the way it's now time to try and keep your characters alive and on the ground. First off cast a round of Big Guard to handle the attacks. To free any characters that get picked up you have two options, first off, kill the arms, or second off kill your character. This can be frustrating if the character who is getting swung around just happens to have a full limit bar but let's not get into how irritating this can be. The arms each have 10,000 HP, your characters should have between 2000-3000 HP, do the math on which is easier to handle. Once your character is dead you can revive them and recast Big Guard and continue to attack this irritating beast. Keeping in mind Limits serve you very well here as does Bolt3 and Trine as it has a weakness to lightning. Throw everything you have at it and hope it doesn't pick up your characters too often and keep plugging away. A very infuriating battle. |
Grab the chests containing the Scimitar and Leviathan Scales and jump aboard the grey submarine. You'll be engaged in firsts with some solder enemies along the way, nothing you can't handle as long as you healed up after your battle with Carry Armor. Tackle the soldiers as they come at you until you get inside, one more fight occurs and then you have a decision to make, you can either kill the remainder of the soldiers or hold them hostage. It's up to you, it really doesn't make any difference. You will notice though that these soldiers are the same ones you taught that awesome finishing move to back when you were pretending to be a soldier in Junon.
Time to sit in the seat and play this godamn mini game. All you need to know is that fires the torpedoes, your average directional buttons move you around. speeds you up and slows you down. You have ten minutes to complete this mini game but in all fairness if it takes you more than a minute you must have slipped into a coma or something... All you do is line up the red submarine in front of you and mash the button to plug it torpedoes. Brilliant.
After the game you will be under the assumption you have to return Junon airport so go in ride the lift and take the top right exit to the air field to discover you're too late. What a pointless excersise... So we need to find the last materia in Rocket Town. So we have one more to go. But wait, we also have a new toy to play with, a submarine. Let's go!