Here we go. The end of the end. The beginning of nothing. Space Monkies, you be sitting down for this one, because now we have reach the end of BlueHighwind's FFIV Walkthrough! And not one moment too soon.
Lunar Subterrane (The End)[]
Go down to B8, to the see the dungeon change radically. Now the area is filled with shiney blue crystal floors and every single random battle will get the boss battle music. But there are still just random battles. No worries. Two pieces of Zemus will show up as well: his malice and Breath. Neither are particularly hard. In fact, the Breath won't do a thing as long as you keep on attacking it.
First off head West just to fill up the map, then backtrack. From here, things are pretty easy. You'll find a Fuma Shuriken along the way. Towards the end, the map will break. Take the Southern dip to find a sword guarded by the second-to-last boss of the game:
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Strategy: An evil Leviathan now wants to play. Of course, it has the weirdest name out of anything in all of FFIV. How do you say that: "Og-Go-Po-Go"? For now, I'm just calling him Pogo, like the stick. Like the battle with Leviathan, Pogo is based mostly on dealing lots of damage real fast. "Deluge" is a real ugly attack, and he uses it twice. Since Pogo counters all spells, use a Spider's Silk to bring on Slow. Since there is no physical counter, you can let loose. I'm so glad for any chance to just use "Attack" over and over again instead of all this "Focusing" and "Jumping" and hiding. Its so weak. To protect your team, you'll need to use both "Protect" and "Shell". Since you can't really use spells, Rydia has nothing to do. Maybe if you're feeling ballsy you can use a double-"Flare" towards the end. This isn't a complicated fight, so I don't have much to say. Win, go on. | ||||||||||||||||||
For winning, Edge gets the mighty sword of Sephiroth: the Masamune. You can now move on to Zemus, or retreat to the Save Point if you're chicken. Anyway, keep on moving to fill up this floor, that's going to get you three Gold Hourglasses.
The final floors go by real fast since they're nice and simple compared to the confusing mess we've had to go through so far. Go Southwest and down the steps to find an Elixir. Now go West and pick up the Gold Hourglass along the way. You've now finished B9 in two sentences. You'll get three Light Curtains. I can walkthrough B10 in just one: Follow the path to the end, grabbing the Fuma Shuriken and Elixir along the way. You'll get three Stardusts for following the linear path. B11 is basically the same, only you get both three Lunar Curtains for filling up this map but also the Treasure Hunter Augment. That's assuming you've filled up every map until now. And if you haven't, I'll personally hunt you down for failing me. That's the only thing that might help get that dastardly Rainbow Pudding, though it hasn't helped me any.
Once you reach B12, heal up completely. The final battle now awaits.
The Final Battle[]
As you head the stairs, a series of scenes will begin. First off, Golbez and Fusoya will fight a mock battle aginst Zemus. Watch as they both completely destroy that silly-looking clown. It turns out that Zemus is such a lame villain that even Dissidia didn't want him, and they were willing to let in Exdeath, of all peons. Of course, Zemus doesn't actually move, and seems more than willing to be destroyed by an awesome "Twin Meteor" (99999 damage!). So I guess we came all this way for nothing, huh?
Well, of course it can't last, since Zemus wakes up into a whirlwind of magic and terrible over-acting. Fake Death Count: 17. He even decided to change his name: now its "Zeromus". I know this is a kinda weird way to look at it, but why is Zeromus so strong now? Golbez and Fusoya just killed the guy. In fact, I don't really get how Neo Exdeath got to be so strong either. Where I come from, death makes you weaker, not stronger. Maybe we're the weird ones, I don't know. So now Fusoya and Golbez face off against a bat stuck in a ball of yarn. This is without a doubt the silliest monster ever. And they lose. Well, thanks to prayers of everybody on Earth, we are able to create a giant Spirit Bomb and blow the monster away. No, but that would be awesome. Instead the party is just revived, even though they were never beaten in the first place.. Now its our turn! Let's show those two how its done!
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Strategy: After everybody finally stops talking in what seems like an endless parade of pointless blathering, you get to finally move and fight. At the start of the battle, you'll face off against that bat in the ball of yarn. You can't hurt that thing, so you have to use the Crystal Golbez gave Cecil. Now Zeromus will reveal his true form, which is a giant crab. Well, at least the music gets ultra-funky in that way that only Nobuo Uematsu can deliver. That Dark Matter doesn't go jack in any way, but I hear you need it for the New Game+. We're not doing that in this Walkthrough, so ignore it. First off, status effects really don't work here since Zeromus's "Black Hole" attack will instantly remove all buffs on you and him. Instead, just attack. Zeromus is interestingly not immune to anything and does not absorb anything, except "Flare". So you have to use "Meteor" instead if you're that high up in the levels (though I wouldn't since Zeromus can counter with "Flare") or Summon "Bahamut". Other attacks include "Flare", "Osmose", and something called "Whirl" which is basically "Tornado" but with far less accuracy. Later on in the battle you'll start to feel "Meteor" coming down. This is all bad, but nothing too horrible. If Rosa keeps up "Curaja"s, you can survive it. But the thing that really makes this battle truely difficult is "Big Bang". Zeromus telegraphs this attack by shaking a bit. After he does that, try to Defend, though it probably won't work. "Big Bang" blows the shit out of your party and leaves them with Sap. So even if you do survive it, Sap will finish the last guys off. The only way to win is to have Kain "Jump" constantly so that he will stay out of harm's way. Though the rest of the party might fall, Kain will survive. Then he can keep fighting until Zeromus takes him down, but then your party will be revived. Bring Kain back to life, use an Elixir or Dry Ether on him, and then you're back in business. You cannot be defeated through the Phoenix method. As for the rest, Edge should throw all the Fuma Shurikens you have. What are you saving them for? Cecil should simply attack, Rosa should heal. Zeromus is a difficult Final Boss, but really there are others that are much more difficult. Eventually he'll go down, and then you have beaten the game. | ||||||||||||||||||
Zeromus declares that he will never die. Then he dies. Fusoya gives a Garlic-worthy rant, tragically prompting Edge for a pun more horrible then any evil brought by either Golbez or Zemus. Anyway, its late so Golbez and Fusoya need to get to bed. Forever. After that, the party returns home to Earth victorious. And there was much rejoicing.
Now each character gets his own final scene: Palom hits on a girl, proving to me ever more that he was the true hero of this story. Then Porom hits him, because that's all she knows how to do. Edge proves to be a dangerously incompetent ruler who spends more time thinking of Rydia than ruling his people. Rydia, not giving a damn about Edge or the rest of humanity, turns her back on us and goes to live with the Eidolons. Yang overthrows the king of Fabul and steals the crown for himself. Nobody complains since the old king didn't even have a name. I love how the old king stands there, now just a trophy at his successors court. Edward comes home to ruins and orphans who want to hear a song. The Dwarves do something, but they're not playable characters so they don't count. Kain, now left with nothing, wanders the mountains alone and filled with self-pity. That's what you get for being such a passive character. Then he takes off his mask and he's... ZECHS MARQUIS!!! No way! I didn't even know that yellow thing was a ponytail, I thought it was a ribbon or something. Cid prepares for a wedding, and Tellah, still dead, rots in the ground.
In the end, that leaves only Cecil and Rosa to get married. Cecil is now the king of Baron, even though he really has no legal right to it. What about Kain? Both are adopted sons of the former king (now Odin), so heredity is out the window. Kain is the elder, and actually a native of Baron, so he probably has more right to the throne then Cecil. Well, Kain has backbone, so he just leaves and gives up everything to the main character. Really, how badass is a character who allows himself to be completely pushed out of everything he's ever wanted? Cecil, the loser he is, just deserves it more. So I guess everything worked out in the end.
The Sequel[]
Is that red Chinese dress and fluffy yellow hair and cute eyes and long legs really enough to play a game for? Tough call.
So, you want more FFIV? First, may I ask "Why?" Okay, you could go back and play the older, less good versions. FFIV Advance at least has real superbosses and a large optional dungeon. This was removed for the DS version because... I don't know.
But if you really want a sequel, go play Final Fantasy IV: The After Years. Personally I can't play this game because I'm currently both Wii-less and without a Japanese cellphone service. But then again, why would I want to play it? Instead of free exploration, we're in episodes, like any of one of FFVII's subpar sequels. Not to mention that this one has even more fake deaths and so much mind-control that you have to wonder if the game designers themselves aren't under some witch's spell. FFIV's storyline was frankly terrible, and I really don't care what happens next... for most of them. Palom, of course, is the exception. I still have my fingers crossed for him to get his own spin-off where he fights his way up the mountain of Purgatory and punches God in the face in Paradise, but that game will never happen. Instead there's this, and this game isn't about Palom, really. He's just one character in a sea of some two dozen playable characters. At the very least, it has Ursula, pictured to the right. I don't know what she does, but when you look like that, you don't have to do a damn thing, honey. Hmm-hmm. Step to the side, Rydia. You're beaten, baby.
So on that rather sexist note, this Walkthrough finally comes to an end. This is BlueHighwind, signing off the way I always do.
- HASTA LA BYE BYE!!!